Dun play doctor with me

When I call ur clinic to check the prescription, this obviously means that I have a problem.

When I identify myself as the pharmacist and informs u that ur patient came here with a prescription written by ur doc, this obviously means that I hav a problem that I need to check w the doc NOW.

When I read the patient's name to you, I expect you to pick out the correct patient card and pass it to the doctor...

... AND NOT PLAY DOCTOR YOURSELF.

The clinic assistant or the nurse here obviously mistaken me as retarded pharmacist instead of the pissed pharmacist bcos the prescription is so damn easy to read. This is what she said:

"It says 10 boxes of Estradiol valerate here wah!"

"I know, but 1mg or 2mg?"

"oh, u mean there is 1mg and 2mg..."

"Yes, that is why I called to check."

"Juz give the 2mg one."

Oh, juz give the 2mg one. Who do u think u r? Can U make the call here?

"U said 2mg bcos the doctor has WRITTEN DOWN 2mg on the card or he has INSTRUCTED you to give 2mg?"

She is dumbfounded.. She shd be..

This is not the first time clinic assistants have attempt to decide on the strength or dosing of the medicine without the knowledge of their doctor and im sure this is definitely not my last encounter w such audacity.

Fine..., if u wan to play doctor w me, better make sure u have a valid medical practicing cert... Bcos if u DUN, Im sure u dun wan to play with the PISSED PHARMACIST.

When I say..

When I say: Can u come over here and take a look?

I meant: Dun stand there like an idiot.



When I say: Payment in front

I meant: IN FRONT, NOT outside



When I say: Cashier in front (after u hav asked me a tonne of stupid questions)

I meant: Will u please get out of my face?



When I say: I dunno

I meant: I REALLY DUNNO which hair color suits u best, I think its best u shave ur head



When I say: It will be better for you to counsel your doctor

I meant: Why are you still STANDING here!! Run to ur doctor NOW!!


When I say: Im sorry, u cant buy this without a script and I dun have this in stock too

I meant: I have this item right in my cupboard now, Haha


When I remain silent (bcos u say thank you or u appreciate my help)

I meant: I dun appreciate your APPRECIATION

Take all the time u need, as if u will ever know..

I think most retail pharmacists would hav handled this group of customers before. They are definitely non-medical professionals however, they believe if they stare hard and long enough on the product they hold in their hands, God will send them all the necessary drug information they need in that few minutes. Damn, I shd hav stare hard onto all my pharmacology papers and wait for God's exam tip instead of studyin my ass off the whole night.

Well, am i fortunate to hav the opportunity to refresh my memory, juz b4 Im off duty yesterday.

Middle age lady with a young kid, askin for something for her kid's cough

Me: "Kid having phlegmy or dry cough?"

Her: "Phlegmy but doc already give her something for her phlegm. She used to take silomat but its withdrawn now. Do u hav anything that contains the same medicine but diferent brand?"

Thoughts: okay, definitely an amateur, be nice

Me: "ok, Silomat is withdrawn becos...." but b4 i can finish

Her: "I KNOW, i KNOW"

Me: "ok, since u know its withdrawn, all other brands which contains the same med hav to be withdrawn too."

Her: "I KNOW, I KNOW"

BP rising like the morning sun...

Her "Do u hav anything that is similar to silomat?"

Me "Yes, I hav dextromethophan syrup. Its meant for dry cough"

Handing it to her and she performs the miraculous act of telepathy between a mortal and God for abt 10 mins b4 my very eyes. I seriously tink Im blessed on the spot...

10 Minutes may seem a very short while for u but its definitely a long long wait for me becos i managed to do all the following things in 10 minutes :

1. Stare at the ceiling

2. Stare at the floor

3. Shout at a suspected addict that we dun sell sleeping pills without a script and we cant sell midazolam to him even if he has a script

4. Look up and down the medicine cupboard

5. Look at my watch and her watch

6. Stare at the lady who is still staring hard at the bottle of suspicious syrup which was handed to her by a professional pharmacist, ME

7. Sigh loudly to myself, hoping she will get the idea that I WAN TO GO HOME

8. Pretend to be a customer myself when any potential customer comes near lookin for the off duty pharmacist

9. Start to wonder if im able to take her on...

10. Finally smile in relief and all ready to snatch the bot back becos...

She has finally finished her little talk with God and turns to me...

Her: "My girl has never taken this before, better not try this." Oh, took u this long to realise that..

I think God has told her that he doesnt know what the crap this crazy pissed lookin pharmacist has recommended.. hence its better not to take anything fr her

or

God is restin today becos ITS SUNDAY and hence he sends his little drug angel to tell her that now is not a good time, pls ask ur medication related question later.

And since the pharmacist looks as if she is going to bite your head off, quick, drop the syrup and RUN for ur dear life.

Oh ya, Run RUn RUN for ur life!!! Satan has taken the form of a Pharmacist and is givin malicious medical advice that might juz cure ur cough!!! Better escape to the nearest doc and get codeine based syrup for ur kid and set the future foundation of drug abuse.

As for me.. I juz wan to go home...

R U the pharmacist?

I wonder why they ask ME this question? I would love to reflect upon myself if its my problem but I ALWAYS wear my white coat WITH my name tag that says: Pissed Pharmacist, PHARMACIST.

So whats the problem? U mean I dun look like one?

I swear i will answer this to the next idiot who ask me this question:

"Why? U mean I dun look like the pharmacist even with my coat on? U r right, Im the cashier."

Moving on w pride

A senior colleague shared with us his retail experiences recently. He has worked in retail for a long long time, 21 years in fact. He revealed his secret to his loyality to retail and that is his love for this job as a retail pharmacist.

And true enough, i agreed totally with him that when u choose a job u loved and u never have to work a day. Another colleague, however, more senior than the first one, left our company to join a hospital. Before he left, he sent us an email telling us his reason of leaving and that is to move on to a place where he needs to learn and he encouraged us to take up a higher degree. And i agreed with that too.

But i agree more with the second colleague and i admired his courage and bravery in making the decision to move on (Hey, he is not a young chap). It is easy to stay in a place of comfort and familarity than to move to a place so chaotic and stressful as a hospital. In his pharmacy, he makes the decisions, he makes the call, he is the boss. In the hospital, he is juz the pharmacist. But who knows, he might like it.

Why do i feel that way? Becos i tink i understand how he felt.. or at least this is how i feel. In the hospital, u hav to work ur ass off. Dispensing, packing, counselling... Patients staring, patients waiting, patients complaining... U have to be on call and any1 can juz call u in the middle of the night for drug info. Its a matter of life and death if a wrong medicine is given in the hospital. Tough job, I know! But u r treated for who u r, a pharmacist.

In the retail pharmacy, I get 0 to5 patients for prescription medicine a day, I sell so many packs chlorpheniramine that i hav lost count. I can eat snacks the whole day and Hey easy job!! but i hate it.

I hate it when aunties ask me which body powder suits them better; baby powder or prickly heat. I hate it when the man yells "U dunno!!" at me when i cant tell the differences between the 2 types of refill heads for his electrical oral B toothbrush. I hate it when im counselling a customer at a busy hour and this guy comes straight to me and ask me where is the office. And when i told him its right at the other end and THIS IS THE PHARMACY. He replied angrily that he is juz askin me. I hate it when im nice to a customer and he takes advantage of that and wants to keep his grocery in the pharmacy til he is off work and free to come and collect. I hate it when customers kick up a big fuss when they cant get their free goodie bags becos they didnt bring along the flyer that entitles them to do so. I hate it even more when they say the flyers are all over the floor and any1 can juz pick them. All these doesnt make me feel very pharmacy-ing

Choosing a job that u love is not easy becos its means that u may have to give up a lot of privileges and freedom. Its also takes a lot of courage to learn fr the beginning and u need to be very humble even if u used to be a tyrant in ur small retail pharmacy. But challenges are wat make life interesting. Overcoming them is what makes life meaningful.

I dunno if staying in the same line for years is meaningful but i certainly know that if i dun try reaching for moon, how would i know if i cant grab it? I may not make a good clinical pharmacist now and most probably i will be placed in the retail outpatient pharmacy initially but who knows abt the future. Or mebe after a trip to hospital i may learn to appreciate retail afterall to know sweetness is to taste bitter.

There are many other colleagues who moved on to different sectors but hospital. And there are so many stories i hav heard abt ugly incidents between the nurses or doctors and pharmacists... And this kinda scares me a little but i think its abt time for me to move on... (after my bonus of course)

I will tell u my adventures in the hospital if im successful. :)

Pls accept me as a drug expert or at least some1 who knows med a little bit more than u

Lotsa customers came to buy travel sickness pills fr me today..

He is one of them.. Tall, polite, decent lookin, english speakin..

Him: "I want this medicine, Dramamine, for prevention of motion sickness."

Me: "Oh, Dramamine is no longer available here but i do have an alternative. Its called Novomin. It contains the same active ingredient as Dramamine."

Him: "Really, does it contain Aspirin? I cant take Aspirin.."

I repeated myself: "There's no aspirin in there. It contains the same medicine as Dramamine. If Dramamine works for you, Novomin shd be okay as well. "

He seemed to have understood me, then he took 3 steps away from my dispensary, stood there for a moment and stared at the box of Novomin.

Then he turned around, came up to me and enquired again:

"This really doesnt contain Aspirin right? Cos i really cant take Aspirin u noe. I get swollen eyes."

"Yes, this has no Aspirin. If there is any, it will be stated on the box."

He seemed convinced enough to go away but I muz say Im veri disappointed.

Why? Becos pple like the above customer, who looks like he has obtained a certain level of higher education, doesnt believe in what the pharmacist says. Even simple things like what this medicine contains, he is sceptical... What does this imply abt the rest of the public?

There's an article in Straits Time abt pharmacist, juz yesterday. It talked abt the role of pharmacist as some1 who spots medication errors and help doctors in the dosing and monitoring of medicine. I have to admit that Im no clinical pharmacist and i have moments of ignorance too. But Im pretty sure that none of the medicines in my cupboard contain Aspirin. I oso know that if u r allergic to aspirin, u shdnt take NSAIDs as well. I bet the above customer dun and i bet he wun believe me even if i told him so.

Yesterday a lady came w a script for Prednisolone. It states:
Pred 50mg for 4 days under instructions and
40mg for 4 days, 30mg for 7 days and 25mg for 7 days under remarks.

For the pple out there who dunno, prednisolone is a steroid and when u take high doses of oral steroid, you cant juz stop them abruptly.

And so i told her, straight and crystal clear. The doctor has written this and how this medicine shd be taken. She dunno believe me AT ALL. Even when i point to the words on the script and read them out word for word, in front of her very eyes, she still dun believe me. She insisted that her doctor told her to take for 4 days only and to infuriate me even further, she asked me if this is how i translate the script. What is there to translate? Its not even a handwritten script, its computer generated. I gave up and told her I dun hav enough tablets for her.

I remembered telling a fren (a teacher) that sometimes doctors make mistakes. She dun believe me. I guess its the same with all the pple out there except for pharmacists. I remember spotting a medication error when i was workin in a clinic as a clinic assistant after my A levels. On the patient's card, under allergy, Ponstan was written and yet Ponstan was prescribed to the very patient on his very first visit. Thank God Im blessed with super pharmacist viligance even without my 4 years in pharmacy school and saved that quack's ass.

Mebe we pharmacists are not as recognized as nurses or doctors becos we hide behind our counters spotting mistakes. We dun say things like, "Crap, Dr Brainless has left out the strength again" (in front of you) but that doesnt mean we dun call the doctor and check with him. A classmate actually told me that there is a "whatever" doctor in her polyclinic becos he always forget to write the strength of Metfomin and everytime she checks with him, he always reply, "whatever".

The only thing patients care abt is how long do they have to wait before they can get their med. They get mad with us when we dun dispense medicine fast enough, but do u understand the frustrations behind every call to the doctor? Sometimes, the doctors dun even thank us and most certainly we dun get any appreciation out of u. Is it our fault that we save ur life when we intervene in a potential drug interaction? A good example would be prescribing NSAID to a warfarin patient. A simple but terrible mistake. A customer of mine told me this is exactly what happened to him and he ended in the hospital for a week becos of internal bleeding. Will this happen if there is a pharmacist around? Probably not. But would u noe if an intervention has taken place becos a pharmacist has spotted and corrected it? No either, becos we hav ethics to protect the dignities of our healthcare colleagues. But sadly, we lost ours in return. How? Why?
Quoting the actual words of a real customer:
" U dun hav to call and check the script. My doctor knows.."

Will dispensing rights be ever return to us in the near future?

I doubt...

Are we going be as recognized as our fellow healthcare coworkers?

I hope...

Are our benefits and monthly pay going to increase?

I dun think so...

Are we going to call the doctors when we spot something out of line?

We muz, in our line of duty..

How are we going to face the angry crowd, waitin impatiently for their med day after day?

Like We always do..

Give me the best!

A customer came to me for earplugs today,

"give me the best" he said...

How do u define the best? I asked...


The most expensive ones? The water proof ones? The foam ones or the mouldable ones? The ones that can be reused, or boiled? The ones that claim to prevent ear infections or the cheapest ones are the best ones?

I guess it depends on each individual.. right?

Many customers has asked me this very question many times since my first day as a pharmacist.

Which is the best? Panadol or Biogesic

Which is the best? danzen or leftose

Which is the best? Ketotop or kefentech

Which is the best hair color?

Which is the best muscle rub?

Which is the best eyedrops?

My obligation as an ethical pharmacist tells me that i should say something like:

"Well.. It really depends on each individual, it might suit someone well but not so much in you"

But of course like all mean customers, you muz break my heart by saying:
"
u mean you dunno lah"

But it IS true, I really Dun.

I dunno how you may respond to each and every different product. U may have a different reaction as compared to ur twin brother even when both of u idiots take the same thing.

Furious pharmacist has a better reaction to lysozyme but serratiopeptiase works better on me. If you ask me which is better for sore throat, how shd i reply you? It also depends on many many other factors. The very same product may work for you in the first time but not the second time.. Now, there is no point getting mad at me juz becos i said it depends individually, u hav to try it urself.

Most pple thought that the best medicine means the strongest medicine.

So does BEST medicine = STRONGEST medicine? Mebe...

But usually STRONGEST medicine = many SIDE EFFECTS.. So

BEST medicine = many SIDE EFFECTS... Hmm... probably

But now, I dun really give a damn anymore... Becos i had enough.

Which one is the best?

The most expensive one.... of course

U got me there...

I tot the knowledge that i hav gained throughout my years in retail pharmacy would be sufficient to answer most questions abt fish oil.. I was proven wrongly recently and as astonished as I am, not by MY lack of knowledge, but by HIS lack of common sense. This is how it went:



Him: "I want to look at some fish oil omega."



Me: "U meant Omega 3 izit? We have this this this, blah blah blah."



Him: "Do u hav any VEGETARIAN fish oil?"



Me: [pause] "hmmm..." [longer pause]



Omega 3 derived from fishes that are fed using some vegetarian source?

Omega 3 from a vegetarian source like fax seed but with added fishy flavor?

I really dunno...

Whats the BIG idea abt Allergies?

I really want to know the answer to the question up there...

The thing abt allergies is that one cant tell... and when i say one cant tell, i meant that the pharmacist CANNOT tell you whether YOU are allergic to this particular medicine or not, if u hav nvr taken it b4 in ur entire lifetime. You, however, would have the answer tho.. or at least in the near future. Its not really my fault when I wun be able to tell you if this medicine will close up ur airways and potentially shut u up forever. I dun really hav an allergic test kit that comes with every medicine on the shelves nor a crystal ball that comes with every operating pharmacy... All i hav are my references like MIMS, Mantindale and DIH and I cant seem to find a sentence in red in any of them stating: Caution, Mr Jackass is allergic to this, refrain fr dispensing. All I can tell you is that drug allergies are for ME to KNOW and YOU to FIND OUT.

So shoo.. go and find out. Do u even know how ridiculously stupid u sound when u asked me: Will this medicine cause allergies? Especially when its an antihistamine, a medicine for allergies. (u really got me there) Or when u tell me u r allergic to this becos u get gastric after takin it. Or when u insist that i give u something mild becos u r allergic to strong medicine... duh... At this point of time, i can only tell u that i am allergic to u becos i can almost feel my throat closing up and my brain is going to the state of comatose due to the lack of intelligence contact...

I tink the best answer a pharmacist can get to the question of allergies would be: I know Im allergic to something but I forgot what is that. Well, in that case, I hope the medicine u r about to take can refresh ur memory.

Btw, if u do get an allergy reaction, irregardless of whether if its juz a simple rash that covers u fr head to toe or the worst kind like an anaphylactic shock, sad to inform u that neither the pharmacist nor the doctor will be responsible unless u hav specifically told us that u r allergic to the medicine we gave you b4 hand. Hah, in your FACE!


So rem the next time when a healthcare professional ask u if u r allergic to anything, it means we are interested in knowing if u r allergic to any MEDICINE and we dun give a damn abt ur mother's cat and the best answer to that question if u hav none, would be: Not that I know of.

I rest my case.

What type of customer are YOU?

Basically, there are several types of customers here in my little pharmacy:

• The Proud: think they know everything and when u try to tell them they are wrong, they go huh huh huh really arh???, almost like a little song you sing to the pharmacist. Dun believe me, dun ask me lah..

• The Ignorant: Dunno what they are looking for, dunno which 1 they wan, dunno the name of the med, the only thing they know are details that i dun give a damn. Like color of the tab is white, the cream is in the tube like a toothpaste, all this means shit in the bowl to me... FYI Im going to suggest the Singapore Dental Society to change the package of all toothpaste to pumps b4 pple start brushin their teeth with hydrocortisone..

• The Rusher: Grab the med fr my hand before i can explain the dosage and splint to the cashier... fine with me if u dun wan to hear me out but dun blame me later when u ate the suppository that meant for ur asshole, asshole..

• The Hard of Hearings: This is the second time u explain to them and they still ask you the exact same questions 2 more times.. They are not old and seem normal.... worst of this kind would be the ones who turn the table around and accuse you of confusing them. Apply 4 times a day, best time to do so would be at night = apply only once at night. Pls Im here to teach u how to use this cream, not english comprehension.

• The Illiterate: If u noe that u hav nvr step into a school in ur entire lifetime and u r not planning to do so either, could u bring something along that can help me to identity the medicine u want to buy? and when i instruct u to do so next time after spending 1/2 hr showing u everything, u get pissed at me and start telling me ur life story of how u noe nuts abt A,B,C , like its my fault that u r what u r now.. I think its time that u go to school and learn how to respect others and be polite for a change.

• The Cheapos: They are the siblings of So & So who are friends with pharmacist X and they expect discount in EVERY pharmacy branch. They are demandin and SHAMELESS... Hey, I dun owe u a living, u noe!! U wan to know why u dun get a discount in MY SHOP? Becos u dun deserve it.

• The Big Shots: They expect you to be in for them all the whole time and they are always in a rush... I cant go out for lunch, I cant go to the toilet, I cant take a break.. Even God have a day off and u expect me to be here on Sunday juz to dispense chlorpheniramine to you? If so, u can hav my job.

• The Asker: U ask and u ask, u enquire and u enquire but u never seem to purchase anything. Do U think im here to entertain you? I hav tonnes of mind numbing paper work to do and a few ass to kick, further more, u look like a pig. So get out of here before i slaughter u for lunch.

Well, thats pretty much for now.. So think abt it, which type are you?

Back off in the name of Justice!!

I have not been writing for some time now becos there are so many things I have to do and nothing interesting's worth mentioning. However, something I least expected happened to me and furious pharmacist (my veri good fren) tonight.


We're walking, we're walking, we walking down the street. Juz stoppin in front of the traffic lights in front of one of the many roads in Orchard today, furious commented: "Wah, red light already and still pple are crossing" and at that very minute, a man who was crossing the road, hit his hand on the side mirror of a cab while its turning left into another road. I muz say He was ANGRY... He immediately knocked on the cab's window and opened the door, demanding the reason for knocking him...


Let's call this man : Ah mean. Well, first of all, our dear Ah mean was still crossing the road when the traffic lights are already red. Second of all, the reason why he hit his hand onto the cab's side mirror was becos his arms are swinging like all normal humans do in order to keep our balance while walking. He might be swinging slightly a bit more becos of what his name sounds like... So its not really the cabby's fault becos he swung his own hand into the side mirror. Lastly, Ah mean, like his name suggested, is really mean. He opened the cab's door and demanded the cabby to come out in the middle of the junction. Btw that time, Me and furious has already crossed the road but something stops us from continuing our veri impt journey of stuffing our tummies with sushi.


Maybe its the many memories of yelling unreasonable customers came screaming into our minds at that very minute or maybe for once, we want to stand up and defend someone, irregardless that this is probably none of our damn business..

So, we crossed the busy road yet again and came forward to cabby uncle and told him what we saw. By this time, dear ah mean has already called the police, whom i think he was pretty sure that the cabby is in deep shit til we showed up... So.. he turned his anger on us... 2 girls...


Furious, unlike her nickname, was very calm and tried to talk some sense into Ah mean's very limited brain cells through his thick skull..

"Sir look, its red light when u crossed so its not the cab's fault in the first place.. "
However, oblivious to any form of reasoning, he screamed : "Look, look, EVERYONE is crossing the road now even though its red lights now!!"


"So what if every1 is crossin in red lights? This doesnt mean its right, its still WRONG!!" I screamed at him... (Dunno wat came over me)

Then he started his nonsense abt if he has a camera and he will take shots of the cab and lights and whatever... and make us pay.. well, i didnt really catch that probably of all the fume streaming out of my ears and furious was confused abt the paying part..


and then he start saying that dun let him catch us crossin the road in red lights, dun try to FOOL him... which, i retaliated.. screaming at him that we wun cross the road in red lights (a big fat lie) and we wun try to fool anyone.. only he is fooling himself..
Well, that certainly shut him up..

Seriously speaking, i dun noe where i got all this courage... screaming my head off at a stranger is really not something i tot i would do. I was a timid child while growing up. Talkin to teachers would make me nervous, walking into an empty shop alone is something i wun do unless necessary even til now, let alone standing up for some1 i dunno and screaming reasons at a angry unreasonable man.

But i was mad, really mad and not becos of who or why but becos of what this stands for, what this means to me.


It means standing up for something that i think and knows im right. It means I make a difference in someone's life irregardless of how insignificant it may be. It means that I will be able to sleep peacefully tonight without thinkin what will happen to the cabby uncle if he is wronged by that asshole. It means standing up for justice. And I feel im on the top of the world now, so will my furious fren, who has also endured the many many torturous encounters with difficult, crazy, freakly, unreasonable and the most troublesome customers of all: the impotences.


Well, the little petty misunderstanding ended when the police finally came and took our statements. Despite we over heard that ah mean may press charges, but who cares? We will still say the truth abt what we saw.

Now, the media has always protrayed us pharmacists as goofy, nerdly people who hide inside our cave-like-pharmacies. Or the pathetic murderer who kills in order to keep the one he loved as in some housewifes show. Or in most public's opinion, the paranoidal man/lady in the white coat, wasting ur previous time juz to check the prescription with ur doctor for ur sleeping pills which is written in a different colored ink from the rest of ur other medicines.


Well, boys and girls, ladies and gentlemen, let me tell u this. We are all stepping out to show u there's more than meets the eye for us, THE PHARMACISTS. We are actually saving ur ass and ur doctor's ass when we call to check ur script. We spent way too much time studying abt the use of medicine to even bother abt ur hair color when u asked me which hair dye will give a darker black. We have far more important counselling to do than to explain the crap to u that u cant buy POM without a prescription, irregardless ur dog ate the script or u, ur mother, father or grand parents lost it or u left it in the cab, u broke the med bottle or whatever smart alex excuses u manged to come up with. We deserve a thank you from u doctors whenever we called ur clinic and tells you that u hav left out the strength of the medicine or the duration of the treatment or to clarify the number of repeats which u so conveniently forget to write for ur sexual derived patients . We deserve some appreciation when we called to check whether u mean diltiazem or diazepam when u wrote diltizepam and not "Juz give *******."

So next time, when u are irritated becos we called and interrupted ur little afternoon nap in the clinic or u juz want to vent ur anger on someone juz becos u cant get ur prescribed aphrodisiac, stay clear of the pharmacist's way cos: Oh No no, WE WUN BACK OFF TIL JUSTICE IS SERVED! Are you Clear?

Somethings wrong with this neighbourhood

Usually, they roam in groups after the sun has set. Wearing bright colors on their faces and ultra-mini shirts on their hips, they try to enthuse the old male human race of the earth. They come in various shapes and sizes and fr all over the world; tall, short, fair, tanned, chinese, philipines, thai... U name it, they got it, all for ur pleasure, sir...

So u ask, what izit going to do w me? Oh Pissed one?

Well, normally i dun really have anything against these group of customers.. They bring us business, buying condoms and feminine wash and all time fav Canesten vag tab... til yesterday...

This lady, lets not say the race but definitely she belongs to the occupation i described above. came askin for OC (oral contraceptives). For all of u outside the narrow circle of pharmacy, OC are prescription only. Meaning: bring me a valid prescription fr a registered doc in SINGAPORE, then i will gladly sell the damn thing to u. Throw in a smile even, if u r polite and keep ur mouth shut while im processing ur script.

Anyway, i told her nicely i need a script. Then she asked abt morning after pills which i told her the same thing. Then she asked me what OC i hav in the pharmacy, which is like so many becos of the customer demand here and wats the point if u hav no script. Gave her straight answer: NO!! and then she insisted on seeing the morning after pill.. What to do?? Customers are our first priority, so i showed it to her and like all hookers fr the that part of the world, she knows no english...

I was abit worried that she might juz snatch the thing and ran off but luckily for me she didnt..
Anyway, she start asking me again why i cant sell her that despite i used all the key words in my first explaination: Prescriptions, see doctor, cannot sell, the law.
Next thing she said is the best, "You cannot secretly sell to me? No 1 will know"
All my explainations down the sewage drain... mebe STD can turn grey matter into jelly like the mad cow disease..
"Sori i cant do that becos i will be breaking the law" are words that came out of my mouth
"U tink i would waste my 16 years of education, my professional license and my future juz becos u had unprotected sex? mebe u shd worry abt getting AIDS instead." My thoughts..

In my opinion..

Was doing OT yesterday in another pharmacy in a classy shopping centre and I muz say the crowd there are nice, polite pple... even this annoying lady who gave me her opinion abt medicine.

Well, at first she asked for some flu med which i gladly dispensed and then she requested for Elomet cream. Well.. unfortuately here in Singapore, Elomet cr cant be sold without a prescription. So I politely told her "Sorry, no script, no cream." Offered her hydrocortisone cr which shd do the trick for her condition but oh no, Im too high class to use a steriod so common and mild.

Then she starts giving me her opinion on how she believes that only oral medicine that can kill needs a prescription and yada yada blah blah... She sort of stood there for a minute in silence after her little speech, I guessed she was hoping that i would break the law for her but I juz smiled sweetly at her.. My thoughts: Try harder


By the by, I too hav some opinions abt :

In My Opinion:

1. All idiots shd be let out of their house ONLY after 6.30pm, the time when Im off duty.
2. All medicine should NOT require a script so that dumb pple and smart alex can take whatever they wan ..... and prove themselves wrong.
3. All cheapoes shd carry a tag, identifying themselves in order to prevent any misunderstandings.
4. An extra charge shd be mandatory imposed on pple who ignored me initially when help is being offered and approached me later when Im busy.
5. A large poster shd be placed outside the pharmacy: STUPID QUESTIONS WILL NOT BE ENTERTAINED.

May the Sun be bright and Sunny

May ur skin be old and wrinkly

This is for the stupid woman who called and harassed me abt sunblock and SPF and how many times it needs to be applied and what if its for everyday uses like not directly under the sun. I am already unhappy becos a man came earlier for the third time for this cough med w promethazine. I told me that this is the last time im giving him and he needs to see the doc if its not better. Then he start raving abt its not for him, its for his fren which he recommends this to and how its works for him and yada yada yada... I switch on my IGNORE mode and try to push my " are u a doctor" speech down my throat.

Anyway, this ultraviolet ray-phobic lady called few mins later and starts shooting me dumb questions abt sunblock and SPFs and drives me mad. I lost it so i answered my last question before telling her "that's all" and cut her off. She tried to call back twice but my refusal to pick up the phone made her lodge a complain abt me.

But surprisingly, I feel I won this battle for once and finally its my turn to piss some1 off. I FEEL GOOD, BABY I FEEL SOOOOO GOOD NOW :D

Most hated customer of the day #04

Mebe its the cool air conditioning inside the pharmacy that drove the pack or simply becos this very pharmacy was built on this super-nuclear powered area that handphone signals are so damn good, more than 1/3 of the imbeciles that walk in everyday are holding a handphone to their ears while attempting to talk to me.

Most of the time, im resigned to my fate as an over-educated salegirl with the power to sell poisons so i try my best to help these idiots by selling them more than 2 pkts of chlorpheniramine. I try not to throw a bitch fit most of the time but sometimes, oh GOD help me, a piece of crap like this guy walks in and i have to show him my pissed face..

What happened was that he came in, asking for antihistamine tablets for his kid who cant stop sneezing in the morning. My sympathies to the poor kid and i hope he didnt get stupid genes, beside the sensitive nose genes, from both his parents.

Anyhoo, like all parents, he has absolutely no idea what his kid is taking so i showed him all the non-drowsy antihistamine tablets tt i hav and waited for 5 mins to the info to be transmitted to his tiny brain. Then after yet another 5 mins, he tells me he cant recognise any of them and of course to enjoy the excellent phone signal here, he pull out his mobile and start rattling off to his wife. Its the busiest time of the day, customers are overflowing into the pharmacy and i can see other imbeciles waiting to pissed me off at my counter already and yet this pig-like human being is still going on and on. Finally, he hanged up and told me H***d, which is the company's name.

Of course i know wat he wans from the med's company so i threw it at him. Now the problem is, he is the one who is unsure... so he has to ask me yet again,"this is the same as Clarinase?" which is NOT, so i corrected him: "no, its more like Clarityne"
" Whatever" is the reply i get from him. Im PISSED, PISSED, VERY PISSED!!!

Pls use your eyes, God gave them to u for a reason

Man came rushing into the pharmacy screaming for a flu med.

Him:"Something that has 5 pieces and is 2 to 3 dollars!!"
Me:"Is this the one?"
Showin him the most popular item in the shop ever: Chlorpheniramine tabs

"No, no!! They are in powder form", he screams at me while running 2 rounds around the shop..

Me: "All the flu med are at this section, mebe u wan to look here. Is this the one? or this? Name?"

Him:"I oso dunno the name" while randomly taking off items fr the shelf. "Yes, this is the one!!"He finally declared. Holding the box in his hands, he asked" How many inside?"

Me: "Its stated 5 sachets here, Its right in front of u"
Him: "If i can see, i wouldnt have asked u!! of course i cant see thats why i asked for help, blah, blah, blah!!"

WHY?? R U BLIND???
becos its clear to me that u r not and i know this becos i use my eyes to SEE ur bloody face!!!
God gave us a pair of eyes for a reason so pls use it. I am NOT ur servant and im not here to tell every1 how many tabs in each box and how much vol of liq is in each bot.
So now i hav to deal with pple who are brainless as well as pple who dunno how to use their eyes? Why do i even bother to help u in the first place!!

Pls, take a GOOD look at urself

Im not here to judge but i really think some pple needs to stand in front of the mirror and take a long hard look at themselves.
i saw something a few days ago and it makes me very uncomfortable. This involves a couple: a 50+ local man with a young foreign lady in her late 20's. Something seems fishy but nothing's really wrong with that. However when she start asking me where is the pregnancy kit.... hmm...

I dun mean to judge becos who am I to do so but when that idiotic man is so long sighted that he cant even see the price tag on the product he's holding... and still chanting "no price means free, no price means free"
he really gets on my nerves. So since im the pissed pharmacist of the neighbourhood, i have a certain amount of nastiness and sarcastism i have to uphold. I turned the product to the side where the price tag is and said to him :"Sir, if there is a price tag and yet u cant see, u have to pay double" with smile of course :)

Despite his laughter to cover up his embarrassment... There are more things i feel like saying to him like:

1. why bother abt the pregnancy kit, dun think ur surviving swimmers can swim that far anymore
2. How long since u take a look into a shiny thing called THE MIRROR and see ur shiny bald head in the reflection?
3. If u wan to refill ur viagra, mebe u wan to come back on senior citizen day so its going to be cheaper for u, uncle..
4. The idea of u and that young lady literally makes me sick.. So pls pay for the slimming tea at the cashier ASAP and get out of my shop before i tell u off, u dirty old man.

Stop coming into my dispensary!!!

Aparrently the person who designed the layout of my shop has absolutely no knowledge of how a pharmacist operates in the retail pharmacy or in my word, brainless. First of all, the pharmacy only (PO) cupboards should not be built opposite of the dispensary. This is because I have to get up from my ass to SPRINT to my PO cupboards to prevent the public from helping themselves. There is a reason why these items are kept in the cupboard and locked up when Im not around. Dear stupid people, this is NOT self service.


Secondly, I do not appreciate people coming in, peeping in or simply standing at the entrance of my doorless dispensary. According to the law, there should be some form of boundary between the OTC (over the counter) items and prescription medicines. BUT needless to say, i dun enjoy such luxuy. I especially HATE it when D&D customers overflow into the dispensary to stare their eyes out at my Prescription only medicines. I can only stop myself fr screaming "GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE" so many times.

Lastly the foldable door at the entrance of my dispensary is practically USELESS becos i have to walk in and out so many bloodly times. The previous pharmacist has actually taped it so that it cant serve its purpose of keeping out idiots anymore and i dont blame her for that. Again I muz rage abt the fact that the PO cupboards are at least 2 metres away from where im standing right now, in front of my dispenary computer. It doesnt help either when Mr Dumbass changed his mind 3 times hence i have to walk to and forth 3 times juz for 1 stupid flu medicine.

Hence I have no choice but to conclude that this pharmacy has the stupidest crappiest layout and to the designer, Im going to STICK that useless piece of crap (foldable door) up ur ASS to ur brainless skull (if i found out u who are.)

Its not my fault that u hav cold sores

Lady came to the pharmacy for "aclo" something for her cold sores which are like all over her mouth.
Me: "Izit acyclovir? Hav u used it before?"
Her: "I dunno, hav nvr used it before"
Me: "Then how did u know abt this?"
Her "Through the internet.." So u r one of the many internet office quack.
Me: "okay, then i guess this is the one u r reading abt on the net" Showing her the expensive branded acyclovir cr.. Hee
Her:"Will it clear up all this quickly? I hav a dinner at night.."
Me:"Well, Im afraid not. The earlier u apply this on ur cold sores, the better the results. I think urs is full blown already." SO SAD..."
Her "Im already applying something I got."
Me: "And what is that?"
Her:"Urh, i dunno, i got it fr a local pharmacy." Oh, That's a very helpful information..
Then she rushed to the baby section and started looking at the diaper creams... Sighhh..
Me:"U know the name or what it contains?"
Her: "I dunno what it contains but the name is cold sore. C O L D S O R E"

Gee thanks, didnt realise thats the correct spelling of cold sore and i also learnt today that the indication of the product is stated on the box, Thats weird, my prof in Uni says its for pharmacists to guess.

Anyway, Im glad that I showed her the expensive brand cos she brought it but sad for her becos after tonight, she will be known as herpe mouth by her dinner companions. :)

Attn all freaks, Stop calling the pharmacy!!

A colleague sent out an email warning us abt this prank call. Apparently a guy has called her pharmacy regarding some problem with the size of his reproductive organ and how the condom dun fill him becos its too small and how it keeps slipping off during action blah blah blah...

My colleague has professionally told him if there is problems with the fitting, there are other alternatives like oral contraceptives for his gal but he kept harping on his tiny winy. Finally he said he will call other pharmacies for second opinion...

Anyway, this reminds me of other weird phone calls I have received throughout my * years of retail experience.

1. Crazy guy with a itchy reproductive organ but keep empathising the comment made by his doctor. "I dunno why but my doc say that my p**** looks very cute" Maybe what the doc meant to say was it looks like a weird castus with all the genital herpes sores growing on it.
2. Seriously menopausal woman calling me every week at the pharmacy I work once a month. Keep repeating the same questions over and over again abt soy phytoestrogens and whether it causes cancer and whether its suitable for her and blah blah blah. It makes me feels like I going through menospausal too, and EVERY MONTH.
3. Idiotic office workers calling me to ask me all sorts of questions and pass me to their colleagues for more free consultation. Hey, Im working now, are U?
4. Paranoidal osteoporosis woman who calls and calls about which brand of calcium i would recommend, which is the best brand, how long has this brand been on the market, how many tablets to take, any side effects, would i take them myself and blah blah blah... All i can say abt this brand of calcium is that it has been on the market since dino has walked on this earth and needed some calcium to prevent osteroporis. Happy now?

Thats all for now but im sure there will be more coming my way, or my phone line. And on behalf of all pharmacists to all freaks out there, who are reading my blog now, pls STOP CALLING US!!

A Perfectly Beautiful day in Hell

"Its really a beautiful day today" i said to myself as i dragged my legs to the pharmacy this morning. The sky looks grey, hinting the possibility of a heavy rain later, filling me with hopes that hell wont release the hungry office workers out later. I have worked continuously for 11 days without a break now and my brain feels like jello..

Anyway, after i have settled down for a few minutes, a barking lady came and threw a bitch fit. Apparently, one of our staff has conveyed some wrong info to her which deprived her of some cheapo benefits she is entitled to when she uses her credit. And to top it off, that particular staff who has convinced her to use NETS instead of credit, has forgotten to give her li******ts, which is the sole reason why she decided to use NETS in the first place.

Yes i totally realised its our fault but OMG, she is such a bitch. Shouting at me and my 2 staffs in front of customers who are waiting for me, demanding some form of compensation despite my apologies. What else do u wan me to do?? Chop off my head and offer it to u? In the end, we hav void the transaction and rekey in as credit for her to get the few miserable li******ts. Hey, congrats, u hav juz accumulated enough points to get the title of the ASSpoints BITCH of the pharmacy.

Then merrily came a pack of foreign workers who wans something that is GUARANTEED to work for itchy white spots. Dunno much english but understands the importance of guaranty. In that case, pls join the queue on ur right and fill up the warranty card that comes with every free pharmacist counseling.

Then the peak period of hypoglycermic impatient office workers came and i have to answer ridiculously stupid questions like:

"This doesnt require a prescription from the doctor, right?"
"Yes, that's why the item is displayed outside, on the shelf for all to take"

"I used this cream on my skin for itch, can i get it here?"
"Sorry mdm, it needs a script fr doc"
"oh, okay. This is to be applied onto the skin, right?"
".... May i refer u to ur first question?"

"What is this carbonate in this calcium supplement?"
"Its like a salt component in order for the calcium exist in solid form. Something like sodium chloride, they have to exist together"
"Oh No.. I cant take this, I cant take too much sodium"

Mr Retarded has to stand in front of my locked cupboard, staring malicously at the medicine inside while i asked him repeatedly what he needs.

Mrs senior citizen keeps asking me for paracetamol which she insists i lock it up in my prescription cupboard.

D&D customers keep bombarding me with sudden outburst of questions. Helpful but idiotic co-workers getting medicines for colleagues, with absolutely no idea as to whether they have any drug allergies or not.

And throughout this whole time, the phone keeps ringing and pple keep trying to pay me money despite the fact that im holding a pen, not a scanner in my hand.

Ohh.. my beautiful day in hell..

Do I look like a cashier to you? And will u juz spit it out?

I dunno why.. customers alway try to pay me despite the perfectly visible cashier counter right in front of the only entrance, fr which they enter.
Perhaps its my bored zombified look that gave me away or mebe cashiers nowadays wear white coats w tags that say PHARMACIST . No offences to all cashiers, I myself hav been doing cashiering since my A levels. But it really sets me off when Im sure U have been here before becos I definitely seen ur bloodly face in the past.... AND still, u have to stand in front of my dispensary at the busiest time of the day and tries to pay me while im talking to some other customers... Its juz pisses me off...

Then here comes the Jackass of the day:

This 50+ dumbass came to get prune juice for constipation in infants. So I kindly referred him to the supermarket becos we dun hav 1. prune juice 2. nor any other juices specifically meant for infants.

"like that arh.. u urh urh... have anything for infant constipation?"
Took a bot of lactulose off the shelf and showed it to him
"urh urh, is it liquid? also juice?"
duh, obviously thats in liquid form...
"Yes its liquid but not juice... Its for constipation and btw how old is the infant?'
"19 mths. can arh? this?"
"yup, no prob. one teaspoon twice a day with some water"
"can arh, urh urh, how much to take?"
Taking a deep breathe and bringing out a medicine spoon for him
Pointing to the 5ml side of the spoon,
"1 teaspoon two times a day, with some water. This will soften the stools so that its easiler for the kid to pass motion"

Then the most difficult question ever posed to me:

"Urh Urh this is a spoon arh?"

Why? does it look like a fork to u too?
What kind of stupid question is this, obviously this is a spoon and SURPRISE!!! this is for you!!

I have actually pointed to the 5ml side of the spoon when talking abt the dose and still u dun get it ??? Are u trying to ask me if this spoon is for you, OF COURSE its for you duh, that's the reason why i handed it to you, IDIOT!!

And pls juz SPIT it out, stop wasting my time listening to urh urh urh in ur every sentences.

There goes a few thousand of my brain cells... I may have to start taking vit B12 soon (as recommended by most hated customer #3) to prevent dementia in my late twenties...

Most hated customer of the day #3

The reminder

I dun have dementia, u dun have to keep repeating that im a pharmacist, a healthcare professional and in my professional opinion... blah blah blah

If ur mother is suffering from dementia and u are wondering ur ass off why is she not prescribed with the magical vitamin B12 by the doctor. CALL her DOCTOR and ASK HIM.

Dun come to the pharmacy and start asking me tonnes of stupid questions: why the generic B complex doesnt contain B12? Why didnt the doc prescribe my mother B12? How is B12 being manufactured by the pharmaceutical plant? Why do pple take B complex? According to this book, B12 deficiency may be the cause of dementia, why didnt the doc give her something that has B12.. ???????

And with almost every question, u have to remind me that I am a healthcare professional whose brain is filled with knowledge to answer any enquires regarding the use of vit B12 and their association with dementia.

First of all, if the bloody B12 is so impt in the treatment of dementia, im sure the doc will prescribe it. Secondly, if you have any problem with the doc not prescribing B12 pls discuss this with the doc. If u r so bloodly concerned abt ur mother, shdnt u pose the question when u accompany ur mother to the doc, u old mama's boy? Thirdly, I guess dementia runs in the family becos do u remember? Ur mother is the one who has dementia, NOT ME. I KNOW im the pharmacist. SO STOP REMINDING ME!!

Most hated customer of the day #2

The D&D customers

These are the deaf (incapable of hearing) and dumb (incapable of speech) customers. Usually they will be lurking around in the pharmacy for some time and when u approach them to help, u find yourself turning into invisible man or woman (in my case) before their eyes.

Okay fine, I get the message and walks away. Then when Im 1. attending to other customers who actually can see me 2. picking up a phone call 3. going to the toilet, you start throwing me tonnes of questions...

Maybe u think I have superhuman powers like the TV show heros, cos as a pharmacist, I MUST the ability to listen and talk to 2 or more pple at the same time after my 4 years of education at Sky High (the super hero college).

Wait, wait let me transform into super pharmacist and beat the crap out of you. PLEASE!!! Im just asking for some basic courtesy...

Most hated customer of the day #1

Balding MEN (yeah, not 1 but 2)

balding man #1:
U r already semi bald... i can see half of ur shining head
if u have tried monoxidil and everything apparently..
Do u think taking Zinc supplements will help??
I think a wig will help more in ur case, with marvelvous results seen immediately. Btw, u look ridiculous with hair growing all over ur chin instead of ur head.

balding man #2:
Yes, one bottle of monoxidil wun help to bring all ur hair back miraculously. It takes time for hair to grow, like all living mortals, unless those are actually weeds on ur hollow head. Yes my dear senior citizen its already on promotion now.. Its cheaper than normal price, juz like u, cheapo.

And to BOTH of you, ONE BALD MAN at A TIME. PLEASE!!!

First tablets, now syrup

What actually is WRONG with these pple??
First they come asking for small white tablets which apparently can be taken for everything, NOW syrup.
"I wan a syrup for children for fever "
"Panadol?"
"No no, its orange in colour"
"Nurofen?"
"yeah looks like it" , opening up the box
"No, no. not like this"
"Mebe its a generic brand? Do you know what it contains?"
"I also dunno leh, my friend gave it to me"
So you just feed your kid whatever ur friend gives to you. I wonder what color is cyanide syrup cos i have a good mind to poison u with that.

Mebe you feel that im juz being petty or touchy but the thing is that it really pisses me off when pple dun respect medicine. If you dunno what it contains, bring the bottle along, write the ingredient down etc ANYTHING!!!! ...I dun like to play guessing games and QUIT WASTING MY TIME!

You have done ur part, juz give me what i wan

What do u mean by i have done my part, juz give you what you wan?

This arrogant dumbass came to the pharmacy and wants something for his cough.
"I have lotsa phelgm stuck in my chest, I wan a cough suppressant"
"Sir, if u hav phelgm u shd use a expectorant to get rid of the phelgm"
"Listen, u hav done ur part, juz give me what i wan"

What kind of crap is this and who the hell do u think you are!!!
Juz give u what u wan, why dun you go to ur doc and tell that to him???

Fine, take whatever you wan and get lost!
U think i would care if you come back with ur lungs filled up with thick yellow bacteria-infested mucus??

AND You still have the cheek to ask me more:
"I have taken Rhinathiol before, is it better than what u r giving me now?"
"Which Rhinathiol? both of them have something for the phelgm. You dun wan that, remember?? YOU WANT something juz to suppress the cough.."
"I took the capsule"
"Yup yup, that too is for the phelgm, Sir. Which is NOT what you wan"

BTW i feel the same way abt you when u shot me the disgusted look.. Im juz giving you mine "Im giving you what you wan" answers. ARE YOU SATISFIED NOW?

White tablet again!!

This stupid woman comes to the pharmacy and asked for neurobion. (cant even pronunciate the name properly) Asked whether its for eyes and nerves.. told her its not for ur eyes, only for nerves.
"Izit..? but i was told that its for the eyes as well"
"No mdm, only for the nerves"
"Is the tablet white and round like Panadol?"
"A lot of tablets are white and round like Panadol"
"I KNOW that"
Then why u asked? ASSHOLE
What is the thing with pple and white round tablet???!!!
Why cant they juz get the right name of the medicine they wan before coming? Dun they understand THESE are Medicines NOT sweets

Then at the very same minute while the stupid woman is staring her eyes out at the box of neurobion i handed out to her, a couple came along and the guy wan travel sickness medicine.

"YES YES, i wan Novomin"
"How many u wan, Sir"
"10 boxes, no no give me more"
Grinning broadly to his female companion, he added "I wan to kill myself"
Now, I can see why u wan to do that, shorty..
Actually if you wan to impress your little fren, i dun think taking the cowardly way out is the plan. But seeing that u cant even reach the shelf i place my Novomin, i think yeah, thats the way of getting yourself a brand new body.

Folic Acid

It's not that i dun wan to serve u, nor do i detest ur dumb ass face but if I am counselling some customers on the use of their medicine and you see that there is a long line waiting... Pls dun join in the fun and ask me for FOLIC ACID...with a bao kong face after waiting for a long time.

There are staffs around who are more than happy to direct you to shelf which is full of boxes of folic acid. If you can open ur tiny eyes and look around in the vitamin section, i'm sure you can find it. DUMB ASS

What med huh?

I juz cant stand it when pple come to me and dunno the name of the med they wan to buy. I cant stand it even more when they say "Oh its a small small white tab" Do you noe that there are so many bloody different types of med in the world that matches your pathetic description of a small white tab...

After confirming what they actually wan (small yellow tab for running nose) they wan 6 packs of chlorpheniramine. 1 pack has 50 tabs, so u wan 300 tabs to commit suicide izit? Fine, fine, u and ur family members take everyday for some itch that runs in ur family apparently. BUT a box of 1000's is a bit too much.. Dun give me all the crap abt giving to ur mother, ur frenz, putting some in ur car.. WHATEVER!btw do u noe that u r not supposed to take that while driving????!!!
So i did wat any ethical pharmacist would do and refused to sell and u called and complained to the HQ RIGHT in front of me.. GO AHEAD!! I DUN GIVE A DAMN.

A little bit abt myself

Hi to u. Let me juz tell u a bit of crap abt myself n what I do. I am a retail pharmacist (can guess fr the blog title unless u r one of my customers) working in a local chain pharmacy. Sori cant say the name of my company but u r welcome to guess.

Most of the time i deal with our dearest, most impt senior citizens who think they are the king of the world (or the pharmacy) and cocky office workers who think they know everything due to the wonderful invention of internet. Occasionally I meet some idiots who takes forever to make up their mind and doctors who thinks Im her personal pharmacist and bitch me around.

Yeah, this blog is basically my way of expressing my anger and frustration towards my work and one day if you see a gal with red vapor coming out from her ears, that's me.. cos my blood has reached its boiling point and streaming out through my ears